The effects of intergenerational trauma may be unseen to people in a family dynamic for quite some time. Once a person sees it for what it is, it is hard to go back and unsee it. Addiction can especially run in families as a behavioral pattern that may destroy generations. Being raised in the light of other people’s trauma can cause trauma of its own for your journey. It is good to understand the dynamics of it in order to work towards healing.
Offer Forgiveness
One of the hardest things to do is forgive people you never met or will never see. You may not have known your grandparents or even great-grandparents, yet you bear the weight of their decisions and legacy in present times. It is not easy but it is necessary to keep progressing. Some people are simply not going to change or they are not around to talk to about it any longer. The key is to find what is healing for you and offer forgiveness for the past and try to move forward.
Validate Feelings
Everything you feel has a valid place in this point in time. You are supposed to have feelings, that is why you are a human being. However, those misplaced feelings can lead to anger, bitterness, or resentment that turn into negative behaviors towards yourself or others. If you are willing to admit when you are wrong, you will not question everything so much. Everyone matters and you should feel free to go and live your dreams. If the family is not supportive of living out your best life, that is not up to you to decide how they should respond. You have every right to love, honor, and cherish your life and find hope in the midst of recovery.
Be Courageous
To be bold and courageous in the face of a history of trauma in the family takes time. There may be a pain, abuse, manipulation, and deceit. It can come as love, but it is not truly loved if people are causing you harm. You must remind yourself to see what is there is better than what you think is there but is not. You might alienate or offend people you love but you have to do what is right for you. Things don’t always have to be this way. You don’t have to suffer because family chose to suffer in the past. Other tips to keep strong in the face of adverse family circumstances are to hold safe boundaries, keep communication lines open, and stay away from toxic people if they are causing you problems. A support group can be a mixture of people, friends, co-workers, or even strangers. It may be formal or informal. The best support groups have lots of experiences, perspectives, and personalities. They will help you navigate life through this challenging time and keep your recovery intact.
Oceanfront will help you kick an addiction to the curb with our premier beachfront community in Laguna Beach. We are founded on the principle of providing the best in care and services at affordable prices. We are located in beautiful Laguna Beach. Call us to find out how we can help you navigate addiction recovery: 888-981-4295
